On Being Grown Up

Whenever I was a kid I thought my parents only responsibility or concern was Alex and myself. They went to work to avoid boredom while we were at school.

We didn't grow up going on crazy vacations. Twice a year we would go to Minnesota to see our grandparents, once in the summer and once in the winter.

 The first time I remember going somewhere besides there was when I was in 6th grade, we went to Gulf Shores. My parents told us that we were going up north to see our grandparents and instead took us to Alabama.

As we moved closer to the gulf they would list the states we were passing through, I sat in the back oblivious. I thought Mississippi and Missouri were the same thing. We had just moved from Colorado to Arkansas and the surrounding states were unknown to me, outside of the mountains I didn't really care. I had also been home schooled for two years so my geography skills, or lack thereof, gave my dad reason to poke fun at my mom.

(It wasn't her fault, I still have a terrible sense of direction and if I haven't been to your house more then four times I'm going to get lost. Mapquest masks this now, in earlier years I just looked like an idiot).

Twelve years later I'm standing in the kitchen of my parents old house explaining to my mother how vacation days work (as if she doesn't know). "So I have two weeks, which you think is fourteen days, but it's really only ten days, because it's a five day work week. So it's just a lot to think about how to use them, where to use them, ya know?"

"Kelsey, why do you think we went to Minnesota all those years? We had two weeks to see family."

I had honestly never thought about it. When you are a kid you see things through  a different lens. And I miss that point of view. The one where leaving for a week doesn't cost you anything and where earning money means making your bed and putting your clothes in the hamper.

I miss getting anxious because I have one worksheet to finish before I can watch Power Rangers and pretend I am the pink one (or the yellow one when Chelsea's around otherwise she'll cry).


The older you get, the heavier things become. People, circumstances and life in general affect you so much more.

Somedays I just want to go back to being seven, crawl underneath my covers and stay there.

I know God created us this way. To grow up (this sounds so silly to type) and experience these different seasons of life. It's a journey and you age in the process. This week however, was one where I wanted to revert and have my parents do everything like the first few seasons.

I guess this is normal though, I'm still adjusting to the stage Todd and I are at now. Trying to put on my grown up lens and embrace it, mortgage, taxes, car troubles and all.

Responsibility is loud unavoidable.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33