I haven't written in so long, honestly, I haven't really thought much of it either. The past year has felt like an absolute whirlwind. I didn't ever think that I had a hard time with change, big change anyway, but my Myers Briggs and the past few years have said otherwise. So, I guess, I'll embrace it. I like it when the leaves change, I don't really like it when life does, I mean, I like it, I don't want to sound completely rigid, it's just hard.
For the past few months, I've finally let myself grieve -- I didn't realize how hard leaving ministry would be. It's an automatic extended family. I guess I should have thought that walking away from that would ache - it just didn't ever really occur to me, that it would. That season of life for Todd and I was so sweet. I wouldn't have wanted to start off our marriage any other way.
We had the privilege of leading students with one another, going to camps, staying up way too late and eating too much Eureka Pizza - really, I don't think I'll ever eat that pizza again. Harpers first trip was a plane ride out to Colorado - looking back, I was kind of nuts, she was 8 weeks old (and a trooper that week!) - I just couldn't imagine not being there for my girls last camp - and camp with Todd was my favorite. He was an amazing youth leader - and I ran our churches fair trade shop and then coffee shop - we intersected outside of student ministry on a daily basis.
Since then, Todd and I have both started new careers. He's a teacher at New Tech High School in Rogers and I run operations and account manage at a marketing agency (Smack.co). The change came at the right time for both of us - we'd been praying about it for a while for Todd and then once he transitioned - we started praying the same for me.
We're both exactly where we are supposed to be - I have such a peace about that. It's just new and different and we don't really get to do it together. I realize this is the norm - that most couples don't get to experience what we did. I have a new sense of grace for those who walk out of ministry -- I get it. I also have a new sense of understanding for couples who go their separate ways in the morning and come home that evening spent -- I get that, too.
But, through it all, I know that the Lord would not call us from where we were if it weren't His Will. Harper is flourishing in her new little preschool - and Todd and I are learning how to share in life with one another in a completely new way. Our weekends are sacred - this is one big bonus, something we didn't ever get before. We are loving Saturday Night at Mosaic. We get to sleep in on Sundays -- watch cartoons and stay in our PJs all day, well Todd and I do, Harper only wants to wear her Elsa Halloween costume on the weekends.
These are good things - and pretty soon, it will feel like our normal, not our new normal. We have so much to be thankful for this year.
Kels
