Jehovah Jira - The Lord will provide

Of course He will, it's been one of His many names since the beginning of time. But for whatever reason I often doubt His provision, worrying myself into a frenzy. 


 I hate that I do this, He's provided for us in so many ways, our jobs, our home, money when we really needed it, I could go on and on, but when you're in the middle of the mess it's harder to focus on those things. 

Lately we've been dealing my dumb car. I'm so over it, not true actually, it's consumed my thoughts for two weeks now. It makes me wish we lived somewhere with public transit. Causing me to daydream of Portland and New York City. The land where no car troubles exist because everyone walks to work, catches the bus or rides their bike. They give smiles and high fives and I'm pretty sure when they're on the bus they break out into song.

Last week I was able to watch God show up in tangible ways, He used these instances to get my attention, reminding me He WILL provide. So thankful I could see it, here's a few stories. 


One of the missionaries from our church came in to Mama Carmen's to buy coffee equipment for his shop across the ocean. Even with the employee discount the price was high. He stood in line ready to hand me his card and instead a woman from our congregation who was right behind him handed out hers. She insisted on paying saying she had been blessed and wanted to bless him in return. He was thankful and she a joyful giver. 


I left work that day happy, watching His name become more real. 


Literally right after this I head to the Greenways for Amazing Race night, I am bringing dessert (why I signed up for the thing I gave up for Lent no one knows). I swing into Neighborhood Market and the lines at every register are ridiculously long. 


I opt for self-check out, where everyone is in a hurry and aware of those behind them. There is an older lady, I'd guess in her seventies checking out, a man behind her in his forties then myself. She checks out all her items and her card isn't working, you can tell the man is impatient, he flags down a cashier and still no luck. It's her card not the machine. 


Poor woman, she had just bagged up all these items, that are now sitting in a cart and she has no way to pay for them. She calls who I assume is her husband and works her way over to the return counter. 


The man turns around to me, "You were so patient through all of that." I wasn't really, I was lost in the trash magazine I had picked up to pass the time. I tuned in when the cashier walked off and when I heard the lady on the phone upset. 


"I feel bad for her, it  kind of makes me want to just pay for it," I said. He stared at me for a minute, "You know, me too." He grabbed his bag, walked over to the return counter and handed her $100. 


I watched the Holy Spirit nudge that man and heard God remind me of His name. 


Same week, I borrow my boss and her husbands old car. When I say old, please understand I mean old--22 years to be exact. It's like my age and they endearingly call it "Pinky." 


They were so sweet to let me borrow it. I kind of felt like I belonged in an Indie movie when I drove it around, so it fulfilled a little side dream of mine, ridiculous I know. But really, can't you see it?

Well I'd had it for 3 days and when I tried to leave a friends house last Saturday it wouldn't start. I was so frustrated/felt terrible, is this my fault?! What did I do? It's midnight, I want to go home! 


They were gracious of course, after church the next day we drive out there and still no luck. Chad tries all the tricks, but Pinky is a goner. Fast forward a week, Chad and Angela head out to tow Pinky, praying it will work.


Chad gets in, turns the key and immediately it starts! The week before it wouldn't even turn over, once again He provides. 


To top all of this off, Todd and I received some extra money, enough to cover the majority of what it will cost to fix my car. 


He comes through, He provides, He proves it. 


Even in the littlest ways. I wonder how much things like this happen around us and we just don't notice. How often are we really tuned into His provision?


My faith feels small. No bow on this one.